


Cracked and broken.

by sweetkisses



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Anxiety Attacks, Boys In Love, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, It is the 90's, M/M, Richie POV, Soulmate Necklaces, They are 17, mostly just fluff tho, no pennywise, this is a sequel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-27
Updated: 2017-11-27
Packaged: 2019-02-07 10:54:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12839670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetkisses/pseuds/sweetkisses
Summary: Richie is good with words, fuck he's great with words, but he can't seem to say "I love you" to his soulmate, Eddie. Sure, both of their necklaces glow the peach color of love but neither boy has actually said it outloud. Maybe these few months of their junior year can push them to finally say it.This is a sequel to my other fic, There is a crack right through my heart, you should probably read that first or else you might be a bit confused here.





	Cracked and broken.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I'm back. 
> 
> This fic took me longer than I thought to write and edit but I also did have a minor issue when writing it but it is all good thanks to some nice peeps. I am leaving what the colors of the charms mean again at the end of these notes. A lot of people requested this to be from Richie's POV so here you go; this is the first time I wrote from him so let me know how I did. 
> 
> Also just stating again that this is a sequel and if you didn't read the first fic then people go do that or else you might be a bit confused. 
> 
> If you have any comments or just wanna say hi meet me here:  
> My Tumblr  
> My Twitter
> 
> (I think I can hyperlink???)
> 
> Mood Colors:  
> Dark blue: sleeping  
> Yellow: laughter  
> Pink: fun  
> White: content  
> Light green: anxiety/nerves  
> Orange: happiness  
> Red: anger  
> Black: sad  
> Grey: scared  
> Dark green: excitement  
> Gold: jealous  
> Purple: annoyed  
> Teal: worry.  
> Neon pink: horny  
> Peach: love

Eddie said he was fine. He fucking told Richie he was  _fine_. So Richie is allowed to be surprised right now?  _Right?_  I mean, fine means  _fine_. It means that Eddie is okay...fine means okay? Yeah,  _yeah_  fine means okay. Eddie is  _okay_. But now, as Richie stares down at his necklace that is a storm of light green and black; he likes to think that maybe fine doesn’t mean okay. Maybe to Eddie, fine means  _anything_  but okay. Then again Eddie said -in his exact words- “Richie, I’m fine. I’ll see you at school tomorrow.” And he said it with a smile. With a smile that said he was  _fine_. Not okay- just fine.

Richie’s necklace says that Eddie is far from fine. Hell, he’s far from okay. Because as far as Richie can tell his soulmate is hurt. Hurting so bad that for once the burning hot necklace that Richie usually wears actually  _hurts_ instead of its usual comforting feeling. Richie grips it for a few seconds, staring at the storm brewing on his own charm as the matching one no doubt turns from an orange happiness glow to teal; worry.

Richie is stood just outside Eddie’s house, having just climbed down the pillar near Eddie’s window mere seconds ago. Which means that whatever Eddie is in pain about is something that’s been bothering him all day. Something that he was covering up with a white content color on Richie’s necklace. And now that the taller boy thinks about it, maybe there was a small speck of black sadness in that white. Which is odd for Richie to not have seen because he’s more observant with Eddie than he is observant with himself.

And that’s saying something. Because Richie loves himself. I mean, who doesn’t fucking love Richie Trashmouth Tozier. Am I right? Yeah, I’m right. I don’t even need your confirmation, I already know.

_Anyways._

Richie let’s go of the burning necklace and let’s it fall to a rest against his dirtiest white T-shirt as he makes his way back up the pillar and onto Eddie’s roof. It’s cold out, chilly in the late October air. The window is locked and the curtains are drawn but Richie doesn’t hesitate as he begins to tap out a random melody onto his boyfriend’s window. It takes a bit, I mean of course it does because Eddie always seems to think that Richie is a mass murder. Every goddamn time. Honestly, if Richie didn’t love the boy so much he would find it more annoying.

Not that they have said that yet. Hell it’s been what? Over two months and neither of them have actually said those three words out loud. They both know why though, each for different yet similar reasoning. Eddie is afraid that even with his cracked necklace something will go wrong. While Richie, well he just thinks he isn’t good enough. He feels like a fuck up -a failure when it comes to Eddie.

It takes a few annoying taps for Eddie to appear. But when Eddie does open the curtain he does it with his head down, avoiding Richie’s gaze as he opens the window as well. He takes a step back, turning away from Richie as he lets the taller boy climb back into his bedroom. Richie hovers behind the smaller boy, trying to think of the words to say. That’s another thing, Richie is good with words but when it comes to  _serious_  words he thinks he sounds like a fucking moron.

“Hey Ed’s,” Richie licks his lips, using a soft voice that he saves for this boy and this boy only.

“Hmm?” Eddie hums, fiddling with his fanny pack that is lying on the desk in front of him. Richie dares to take another step forward. He places a hand on the smaller boy’s shoulder and it’s shaking. It’s fucking shaking. So with a small nudge Richie turns Eddie around.

“Oh,  _baby_.” Richie whispers, seeing the pain and tears falling across the other's face. It breaks Richie. It hurts him and he doesn’t even need to look down to see Eddie’s necklace change from worry to sadness. Richie grabs the smaller boy by the shoulders and pulls him into his chest. He feels his shirt dampen as it adds even more grime to it. Then again, Eddie is  _anything_  but dirty.

Richie wraps his arms right around the short boy’s shoulders and holds him close as he presses his face into the dark hair. It smells good, like lemon shampoo. Richie closes his own eyes as he hugs his soulmate, trying to absorb the boy’s pain. He wishes Eddie didn’t ever feel like this. He wishes that Eddie was always happy. He wishes he could go back in time and stop every situation that hurt his baby.

Eddie’s arms are squished between them. Gripping the dirtiest shirt in the world and for once Richie regrets not changing into something clean. Then again he was in a hurry to get here, he had to see his boyfriend. That’s the only reason really.

Let me explain though.

 School has been going well but of course the other day Richie  _accidentally_  got an all-day dentition. Which was during school today. Which is why he was in a rush to visit his tiny boyfriend after school -where he had to stay an extra hour for getting in trouble whilst in detention. So he didn’t get to bike home with Eddie. It’s all bullshit. They got to spend about four hours together until fucking Sonia told Eddie it was bedtime.

So something must have happened from seven in the morning to four in the afternoon when Richie wasn’t there.

“Why don’t you shower?” Richie hears the small boy say, sobbing only slightly as he grips the shirt even harder.

“I’m boycotting the water company.” Richie jokes, a small smile on his lips while his face is still pressed in the others hair.

“Fucking disgusting.” Eddie mumbles into his chest, wiping his snotty tear filled face on the dirty shirt. Richie thinks he’ll throw it out after tonight.

“Yeah, but you love it.” Richie continues to joke. Eddie cheek is pressed against his soulmate necklace and he knows Eddie is basking in the warmth it’s giving off. “What’s wrong baby?” Richie asks, his face still pressed in the others hair. He feels the smaller boy shake his head as he mumbles into Richie’s shirt.

“You won’t laugh?” Eddie asks and Richie actually holds in a laugh just the fact that Eddie thinks Richie would laugh at him right now is a joke itself.

“You know I won’t laugh.” So Eddie takes a step away from Richie, gripping onto the taller boy’s soulmate necklace as he stares at it and whispers through silent tears. Richie reaches up to clean the boy’s face off, not worrying about his hands getting gross.

“I had an anxiety attack in gym class.” Eddie whispers. So quiet, it’s so quiet that Richie could swear he didn’t even say anything.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Richie asks, wiping away more of Eddie tears. They haven’t been dating long and this is the first time Richie has seen the aftermath of Eddie’s anxiety attacks. It worries the taller boy, it makes him fear the future when he finds Eddie in the mists of an attack and he won’t know how to act. That’s in the future though so he’ll worry about that later because it’s the present and now he needs to worry about his boy.

“There was this guy,” Eddie hiccups, working himself up, “and he-he pushed me into the mud. Into the fucking mud. Then he called me-,”  _hiccup_ , ”he called me a  _queer_.” Then he’s sobbing again into Richie’s chest.

“Ed’s-.” Richie attempts, his mind going to the bottle of pills that shakes in the black rose fanny pack.

“I shouldn’t have had an a-attack. I should have been fine but- but everyone was w-watching me and I-I- was alone-.” Eddie’s words are cut off as he lets out a loud choked sob and presses all of his weight into the taller boy. Richie feels an instant wave of guilt run through his body.  _No_. Not a wave more like a fucking wrecking ball that slams into him and if he wasn’t gripping Eddie so tightly he would have been knocked over from the force.

It’s his fault. He has gym class with Eddie. And he was in detention. He missed gym. He missed his boy in those short blue gym shorts. He missed the  _motherfucker_ who Richie is going to  _murder_  tomorrow during gym. The fucker who hurt his boyfriend because Richie wasn't there to stop it.

And that’s when Richie begins a list of things he’s fucking up.

“Ed’s.” He whispers, pulling the boy even closer and wishing - _hoping_ that this is enough. That this is what Eddie needs right now. If Eddie needs something else than Richie will fling himself out the window to help and fix this terrible thing he's done. He'll do anything to stop himself from feeling this hatred of guilt and to stop Eddie from feeling this cracked.

No, not  _cracked_. I mean hurt. Just hurt.

And now Richie feels tears of self-hate well in his eyes as he pulls Eddie closer -as if that’s even possible at this point. He presses his face back into the boy’s hair and does what Richie always does when he’s sad or hurt. He sings. It’s not good -actually it’s terrible. But there are only three things that make him feel better; his friends, Eddie and music.

So he sings to his soulmate, not fulling knowing what to say. The jokes in his heads are far from appropriate right now.

“Elton John?” Richie hears and he stops singing.

“Yeah,” Richie mumbles into the dark hair. “It helps me feel better sometimes. I, um, -is it making you feel better?” Richie asks, awkwardly.

“You make me feel better.” Eddie tells him. He’s stopped crying but neither boy let’s go. They stand their holding and absorbing each other’s pain. Swimming in their love for each other. Waiting for what’s to come this year. Maybe it’s heartbreak, maybe it’s anger, maybe it’s pain but Richie hopes that its laughter, smiles and happiness.

God, he really hopes so.

*

It’s been a two weeks since Eddie’s anxiety attack and he’s seems  _okay_. Richie’s necklace is always a orange glow of happiness -even in gym class. Where Eddie wouldn’t tell him who the fucker is that Richie needs to murder. So instead Richie has just been glaring at everyone in the room and made sure to be  _extra_  violent during dodgeball. He was actually asked to sit out during the last round. Eddie just smiled gently at him and fuck does Richie love that short fucker. Eddie also won dodgeball with his beautiful shorts and quick feet. Richie’s proud.

Its lunch time now and Richie has his mouth basically against the smaller boy’s ear as he whispers dirty words into his head.

“-those shorts should be fucking illegal because god damn your legs look so fucking yummy in them and your ass-.”

“I swear to god if you don’t shut up I’m going to kick you in the balls.” Eddie growls back at him, his face redder than Bev’s hair.

“My balls are already blue Ed’s-.”

“Yeah well I’ll make them fucking black.” Eddie turns to him and smirks. Their mouths are barely a inch apart so Richie presses their lips together, just because he can. And damn, he is a  _bit_  horny. They haven't fucked yet, no they have only gone to third base. In Richie’s mind that’s a blowie and Eddie actually let him finger the smaller boy.  _Yowza_ that was a night.

Let’s stay a bit more in the present story shall we?

“I’d like to eat without seeing you two suck face.” Richie pulls back and smiles at Ben. He places a hand across the table, reaching for Ben’s hand. The boy cringes back but Richie leaves his hand there open and clammy.

“Haystack, worry not. Bevey boo will kiss you soon.” Richie uses an odd accent. “Hey! That rhymed.” He yells to the table and looks at a smiling Eddie who rolls his eyes.

“Nasty.” Ben replies and kisses Bev’s cheek as she joins the table.

“So get this,” Bev huffs out, “I’m late to German because I was in the bathroom and when I walk in some  _fucker_  was in my seat.” She growls out.

“Did you ask her to leave?” Mike asks in his deep voice, his necklace white.

“No I didn’t not kick  _him_  out. Eddie would you care to explain?” She turns to the smaller boy.

“I was helping him read the directions for the assignment.” Eddie shrugs, fiddling with the zipper on his fanny pack.

“Oh really? I’d say he was flirting with you.” Bev smirks, crossing her arms and leaning back in her chair as she watches the fire she lit grow.

“Who the fuck was flirting with you?!” Richie shouts at the small boy. Not angry, no -not at Eddie. Hell even if they weren’t soulmates Richie would still be drawn to those wide eyes and that soft face. He would flirt the fuck out of Eddie; soulmate or not.

But the thing is Richie is Eddie’s soulmate and everyone in the school knows that. Ever since this school year started and Richie told basically everyone he introduced Eddie too.  _“Guys this is my Eddie, he’s moved from New York and he’s my fucking soulmate.”_  For fucks sake Richie told the goddamn janitor. So why the fuck, what the fuck, and who the fuck is flirting with his soulmate.

“He wasn’t  _flirting!_ He didn’t understand the directions. I was being nice and helping him. God forbid someone sat in your fucking seat Bev.” Eddie says slightly annoyed. Bev doesn’t respond, well because Richie is about to fling himself out of his seat and fight everyone in the cafeteria.

“Who was it? Was it that Steve guy? I’ll fuck him up.” Richie says, his eye catching a popular boy named Steve whose soulmate necklace is clear so he feels the need to flirt with anyone. Richie begins to get up and head in the boy’s direction but Stan is tugging him back down.

“Sit down and chill.” Stan tells him, a look of amusement on his face.

“Rich, don’t listen to Bev she’s just being bitter because I didn’t save her seat-.”

“Friends save friends seats, Eddie!” She shouts. Ben places his face in his hands, tired of the yelling. His necklace is a deep purple for Bev’s annoyance.

“Bev is it-.” Bill tries.

“I’m sorry, can everyone shut the fuck up and tell me who I gotta beat the shit out of?” Richie interrupts, still eyeing around the room at the fellow juniors.

“Richie, he wasn’t flirting with me-.”

“It was Jared Carson.” Bev spits out, her face still angry. Richie turns to Eddie and watches as Eddie’s necklace reflects his mood; gold for jealousy. Fucking Jared Carson. The schools stoner. A senior who doesn’t wear his soulmate necklace. Fucking Carson who would fuck the whole school, girl or boy, soulmate or not. And he seems he has chosen Eddie for his next target.

"For the last fucking time. He wasn’t flirting, he asked me to translate the directions for him and then he asked to be my partner since his was out sick.” Eddie hisses out to Bev, angry at her for making a big deal of nothing.

“Fucking motherfucker.” Richie says and if he was a dog you would hear a loud growl rumbling from his chest. Eddie places a hand on Richie’s arm, gaining his attention again instead of the scene playing in Richie’s mind. It’s him murdering Jared pretty violently with a knife.  _Just saying_.

“Rich, calm down-.”

“I am calm.” Richie tells him, his necklace burning hotter with Eddie’s touch. The others necklace is probably going through its bipolar temperatures that Eddie described to Richie once but he’s so blind and jealous he can’t even fully remember the conversation.

Richie debates punching the wall next to them.

“He’s gonna kill him. Nice job Bev.” Mike sighs out, as the red hair just shrugs her shoulders. Happy with revenge. Over a goddamn seat. Evil little girl.

“Richie, won’t kill h-him.” Bill thinks out loud.

“Oh no I will.” Richie says. “Probably sneak into his house one night and kill him with my bare hands around his neck, watching him gasp for air as I-.”

“Okay, James Bond that’s enough.” Eddie giggles and pulls Richie down for a kiss, a long deep kiss that Eddie allows Richie to push his tongue into his mouth. The tingle of jealousy goes to the back of his mind as his love for the boy flies forward.

 _Fuck_ , Eddie can kiss.

And when they pull apart Eddie pecks Richie on the nose. A look in those wide eyes tells Richie not to worry. He shouldn’t be jealous - _he shouldn’t_. And for the rest of lunch he isn’t. But Richie adds that to a list of things he’s failing at. Protecting Eddie from anxiety attacks and now keeping Eddie to himself.

*

“Josh told me to tell you that you need to clean the bathrooms before we can leave.” Eddie tells Richie as he makes his way back into the ticket booth. Richie squints his eyes at his boyfriend. He looks damn cute in that vest and fanny pack. 

“You look too cute right now so I can’t tell if he told  _you_  to clean it or if he really wants  _me_  to clean it?” Richie grins. “I know your tricks Mr. Kaspbrak, I know you hate cleaning the bathrooms.” Richie glances down at the boy’s necklace; pink for his fun is glowing at him.

“I would never trick you like that.” Eddie gasps dramatically. Richie holds in a laugh.

“How about, my dearest shortest Ed’s,” Richie takes a step forward and grabs a pen off the table in front of them.

“Don’t call me that.” Richie ignores him and continues.

“If you can reach this pen then I, the bestest trashmouth of the fucking land, will clean the bathrooms.” He uses a weird viking accent that he hear once in a movie. He holds the pen up high, straightening his arm and adding to the already six plus height that he is. He smirks down at Eddie who blinks his wide eyes up at him.

 _So fucking cute_.

“I’m not playing little games, Rich.” Eddie says but there is a smile on his face that says otherwise.

“Alas, if the one they call Ed’s does not acquire the ink object than Ed’s whilst be the one to freshen up the toilet areas.” Richie tires, using an old time British accent. Not his best if he’s being entirely honest but it does make Eddie’s face scrunch up in annoyance. Fucking cutie.

“I said don’t call me Ed’s.” The small boy says.

“Oops, sorry Spaghetti Head.” Richie teases, the pen still held tight even though Eddie hasn’t even tried to reach for it. The small boy does take a step closer, entering Richie’s personal space.

“You have three options,” Eddie whispers. “One, you can put the pen down and clean the bathrooms for your boyfriend. Two, I can kick you in the balls and you’ll drop the pen and you can clean the bathrooms for your boyfriend. Or three, I kiss you until you lower your arm which is when I will grab the pen. And then you’ll have to clean the bathrooms. So choose wisely.”

Richie picks option three but  _not_  before he gets a large hand on the others ass and his tongue deep in his throat.

They go home after Richie sloppily cleans the bathrooms. It’s Eddie’s bedroom they end up in. Always Eddie’s bedroom. Richie has never and will never let Eddie into his house. Into that beer can filled house with a drunk abusive father. His father who keeps waiting for Richie to bring home a young beautiful  _female_  soulmate. Fucking Wentworth Tozier. The asshole of Richie’s small life.

Sonia is sitting in her stupid chair when they walk in. She’s a terrible parent too. Ugly as fuck. And for all the jokes Richie makes about her, he sometimes regrets them because she’s just as shitty as Went. She does emotional abuse to poor Eddie. She is fucking insane. She’s the one who almost ruined Richie and Eddie’s chances at finding each other at first. But that was another story, one that I already told.

“Eddie. I see you brought home that dirty boy again.” Sonia says, clicking her tongue in annoyance. It’s no secret that Eddie’s mom hates Richie. Honestly like everyone fucking knows she doesn’t support them together. Soulmates or not she hates them. They both know why, one look at Eddie’s cracked necklace and another towards Richie is enough to answer that question.

“Yes mom, I brought my soulmate home, _Richie_. You remember his name.” Eddie rolls his eyes, face angry as he toes off his shoes. Richie leaves his on, he’ll take them off when he gets upstairs. A few weeks into when they were dating he left them at the front door once and Sonia actually threw them away. So yeah, not making that mistake anymore.

“Don’t think he can stay long.” She clicks her tongue again. Richie doesn’t say anything. He knows she’ll pretend as if his voice is not real. “In this house or as your boyfriend.” She finishes.

“I think I can make decisions for myself, mother.” Eddie growls out, yanking Richie’s hand up the stairs. He hears Eddie let out a sigh of frustration. He knows how much it sucks to have your parents treat you without love. And if anyone deserves love it’s Eddie.

“Your mom is looking mighty fucked out from our activities this morning.” Richie jokes, falling diagonal onto the bed. 

“Hmm, is that why you were late to pick me up at my own house for work today?” Eddie fires back, his face relaxing now.

“Touché.” Is all Richie can think to say.

“I don’t think you know what touché means.” He hears Eddie mumble as he slips out of his work clothes and into something more casual for a nice Saturday.

“I don’t think fucking anyone knows what touché really means.” Richie points out, he stares at the ceiling, breathing slowly.

“Or maybe it’s just you that doesn’t know.” Eddie offers. Richie just shrugs in response.

“I think I might actually need a nice nap.” Richie yawns out, closing his eyes. His necklace is hot against his chest, he basks in it, sinking deeper into the bed thinking about a nice sleep cycle. A cycle that doesn’t get to start because the bed dips down around his waist as he feels a small wide eyed boy straddle his upper thighs. Richie let’s a smirk appear on his face but he keeps his eyes closed and his arms spread wide.

“Your necklace is neon pink.” Eddie tells him, his small hands slipping under Richie’s shirt. The taller boy still doesn’t move.

“Hmm, is that true?” He feels a soft kiss to his jaw. He knows that Eddie’s necklace is turning into a neon pink as well; horny.

“Yeah,” Eddie kisses the corner of his lips.

“I better get downstairs then, your mom is probably dripping wet waiting for me.” He receives a pinch to his stomach from Eddie. The smirk not having fallen off his face as he blindly moves his hands to Eddie’s thighs, squeezing them ever so slightly where his fingers lay fanned out across them.

“I fucking hate you.” Eddie tells him and presses their mouths together for a short kiss. When they break Richie allows his eyes to open to see Eddie’s necklace swinging lightly from where it’s dangling above Richie. Eddie’s hands still under his own shirt -just resting above the waist band- keeping Richie extra warm.

“Hm, you might hate me but you sure do love my wang as well as-,” and he’s cut off again by the smaller boy’s lips. Richie smiles into the kiss as he feels Eddie pinch him in annoyance again.

Fuck he loves his boy.

*

Richie walks out, fifteen minutes after the school bell rang, after having a ‘stern talking too’ about his missing math homework. He said he’d have in it tomorrow which means he is gonna force Eddie to let him copy his. Then they can make out. Or they can make out and then do the homework. Or they can just make out. Does Richie really need to do the homework? (Yes, yes he does)

The lanky boy walks out the school into the cold middle of November air and down the front steps, humming along to his Walkman as he approaches the bike rack where Eddie is waiting with -.  _No_. Richie tears his headphones out and stomps his way over to his boyfriend. He throws an arm around Eddie and lands a wet kiss against the corner of the others mouth. He hears Eddie squeak in surprise.

“Hey baby.” Richie mumbles, trying to go in for another kiss but Eddie is giggling and placing a hand on his chest. On his soulmate necklace. Because they are soulmates and not fucking-.

“Hey Richie.” Jared Carson says and Richie holds in a growl as he glances at the older boy. He’s tall, almost as tall as Richie with gross thick curly hair that is styled in a mini Afro including an obnoxious pic sticking out of it. He has on a button up shirt, three buttons not even buttoned to show his chiseled chest. A chest that doesn’t hold his soulmate necklace; because he’d rather fuck randoms than find his soulmate. He also reeks of weeds.

 _His face is stupid_ , Richie thinks. Fucking stupid and annoying and asking for a nice punching.

“Jared. What the fuck are you doing here?” Richie asks, a smile on his face but his voice filled with anger. Eddie just grips his hand, squeezing it as if telling him to behave.

“I mean I do go to school here.” Carson says.

“I meant what the fuck are you doing with  _my_  Eddie.” Richie growls out.

“Just talking to  _my_  German partner.” Carson smirks with a knowing look in his fucking blue eyes. Richie can’t wait to watch them pop out whenever he chokes Jared later.

“Rich.” Eddie warns in a soft voice. A voice that could make Richie fall at the knees and do whatever the small boy asked him too.

“Hmm.” Richie hums, vibrating with anger and jealous. He watches as Carson glances down at each boy’s necklace. Eddie’s is purple while Richie’s is orange.

“Yeah turns out that day he sat in Bev’s seat and we worked together on that assignment was actually a project.” Eddie says.

“Yeah, which means Eddie here and I will get to spend a lot more time together. We were just discussing when we can meet up outside of school.” He tells Richie but keeps his eyes on Eddie as he talk and it makes a burning hot rage fill in Richie’s gut. He curls his free hand into a fist, knowing that if Eddie wasn’t here he would punch Jared and then punch the brick wall of the school.

“Well, not today. My  _boyfriend_  and I are hanging out. Now if you’ll excuse us.” Richie pushes past Jared and pulls Eddie towards their bikes. He hears Eddie bid Jared a goodbye as they bike to Eddie’s house.

When they get there Richie throws his bike down in anger and without yelling he speaks his thoughts.

“You’re not doing a project with  _him_.” Richie growls out. “Not while I’m still alive. Go to the teacher and tell her you want to work with Bev.”

“What’s the big deal if I work with Jared?” Eddie defends, crossing his arms over his chest as they stand on his front lawn.

“Because- because he’s just trying to fuck you!” Richie shouts, throwing his arms up, “he doesn’t want to work with you he wants to fucking work in you!” Richie is yelling, he shouldn’t be but he is. A ball of anger and rage and jealousy is burning inside of him and on Eddie’s necklace.

“Ew don’t say that. We are working on a project for two weeks Richie, I think I can handle myself not to fuck this guy.” Eddie says, offended. His pissed too, Richie can see it on his scrunched up adorable face and if he wasn’t so pissed himself Richie would be kissing him right now.

“It’s not  _you_  I’m worried about it's  _him_. You don’t know him like I do. He finds a target, gets them high and then fucks and dumps them.” Richie explains, stepping into Eddie’s space. His necklace is hot and it feels nice and good and it’s calming him. He takes a deep breath.

“First off, I have asthma so I’m not getting high anytime soon.” Eddie chuckles, sensing Richie’s calmness and matching it. “Second, I think there is only one boy I wanna fuck and he just so happens to be my _soulmate_ and he’s standing on my lawn and he showers like once a week.” Eddie smiles.

Richie pushes down his anger. Eddie is right. They’re soulmates. Eddie won’t just go fucking some random stoner. No he wouldn’t do that do Richie.  _Right?_  Yeah -no he won’t.

So, Richie smiles back and looks at the gnome sitting on Eddie’s lawn.

“Is it him?” Richie points to the gnome and earns a loud laugh from Eddie. “I think that he might be a little too short for you, I thought you liked tall boys?” Richie teases and Eddie just giggles at him. He throws his arms around the glasses boy’s neck and pulls him in for a kiss.

It’s later that night when Richie is biking home that he thinks of Jared and he thinks of Eddie and all his anger, jealousy and fear is rushing back into him.

Richie hates it. Hates how he’s feeling. He feels like he losing the one thing he really loves. That maybe this soulmate thing isn’t an everlasting thing. _But it is_. It’s unheard of for a soulmate to leave once they find each other. It’s your soulmate, the best feelings in the world you’ll feel around them.

It’s normal for those who haven’t met their soulmate to sleep around or date but it’s never anything serious. It usually ends in just friends anyways because they don’t feel the pure peach color love that they’ll feel with their soulmate. And Richie has that feeling and so does Eddie. He can see it on the boy’s face. He can see it on his cracked charm when Richie feels like he might explode for the boy.

It’s amazing. It’s the best feeling in the world. He knows Eddie loves him, he knows  _okay_. But, but a small voice -an evil voice- tells Richie that maybe that crack on Eddie’s necklace might hurt Eddie more than he thinks. That the crack might break the both of them. That Richie might crack as well.

And when he thinks of Jared Carson, Richie feels himself cracking just a bit.

*

Richie voices his worry about Jared to Stan the next day. They’re standing in the hallway, waiting for Eddie and Bill to exist their class. Richie trusts Stan, his best of friends since kindergarten. So he tells him how he’s scared, how he’s angry and how much he wants to fucking stab Jared Carson in the neck.

“Don’t worry.” Stan tells him, interrupting a detailed rant about Richie burying the body in the woods.

“Don’t worry!? Have you not listened to one fucking word I’ve said!” Richie hisses at Stan, throwing his hands up in annoyance.

“Eddie isn’t going to leave you for fucking Jared Carson. I’ve seen the way that boy looks at you, hell everyone has and everyone would tell you the same damn thing. Eddie fucking loves you and he’s not gonna leave you.”

It doesn’t help Richie. In fact it makes him worry more because Stan said  _love_  and his own dumbass and his dumbass boyfriend can’t even fucking admit but Stan can?! Then again Stan always gave zero shits about everything. He’s the best one to go to for advice because he’ll be straight up with you.

“Okay, but what if he does.” Richie says slowly.

“What if he does what?” Stan waves to Bill and Eddie who are quickly making their ways towards them. Richie speaks quicker.

“What if he does leave me? What if he falls for Jared instead? What do I do then?” Richie begs. Stan turns to him, looking him dead in the eyes and tells him the truth.

“Eddie is not going to leave you. He’s going to do the project for Carson for two weeks. And every day he’s going to come back to you and kiss you and tell you he loves you. Just two weeks you gotta deal with Carson."

Then Eddie and Bill are next to them. Eddie smiles and leans up to kiss Richie’s jaw. Richie smiles back and makes a joke about Eddie being short and looks at Stan. He still has more to stay, more things to tell Stan that he worries about. Worst of all; Richie can’t comment about how what if these next two weeks with Carson breaks them.

*

Turns out even after the two weeks and Eddie finishes his project Jared is still fucking around. It is the beginning of December and Jared still hasn't fucked off. Whenever Richie isn’t with Eddie he swears that Jared is there instead. Richie has lost count of the amount of times he’s late to meeting with Eddie and has to drag them both away before he beats Carson’s face in. Eddie keeps telling him that Carson means nothing, just a classmate. He tells Richie that he’s his  _soulmate_. His soulmate that neither of them can say that stupid three word phrase too. Those fucking three words that would probably save them all the trouble.

But then one week Jared Carson seems to disappear. When Richie comes out of school late like always Eddie is holding his homework close to his chest and waiting  _alone_  with a smile. When Richie meets Eddie at the small boy’s locker after English class he’s aloneagain. When Jared walks past them in the hallway he doesn’t even acknowledge Eddie. Richie sticks his chest out, proud that he intimidated the fucker enough to finally fuck off.

“Eddie threatened to cut his balls off.” Bev tells him one day when he mentions Jared and Eddie. They’re outside before lunch, taking a nice smoke break from school.

“What?!” Richie yells, looking at the redhead; her necklace is a nice white for content.

“Yeah, he kept stealing my seat after the project and kept following Eddie around. Eddie told him to stop, even said he was annoying him but he kept on going,” Bev takes a drag, “then in German one day he whispered something to Eddie and then Eddie shouted that he would cut his balls off if he didn’t leave him alone.”

“What the fuck?” Richie smiles. Happy at his boy for being a badass but also guilty that he wasn’t there to stop Jared. He wonders what Eddie said. He wonders if that’ll happen to Richie one day. Will he say something that takes it too far? Maybe. I mean he’ll get stabbed because of his trashmouth. 

“It was pretty funny. I’ve never seen Eddie that mad before. I mean I see him irritated and annoyed-,” both usually around Richie, that thought twists uncomfortably into his gut. “-I got my seat back though. Thank fuck for the anger in that kid.” She throws down the bud and stomps it out under her shoes. Bev tells Richie she’s heading inside; cold and getting hungry for lunch. Richie stays out, beginning to smoke another cigarette. He decides to skip lunch as he thinks.

He thinks about how he loves Eddie. How much he fucking loves his  _soulmate_. But there’s something he’s been doing that feels like he’s failing at. He feels like he failing with Eddie. With Eddie’s anxiety and his cracked necklace; it’s always in Richie’s thoughts, hiding in the back. It’s not a burden - _no_ , Eddie is anything but a burden. But it worries Richie. It worries him that he’ll fuck up somehow.

He’ll fuck up with Eddie; maybe it’s because they  _still_  haven’t said those big three words. But Eddie loves him. Right? Richie’s seen his necklace turn that beautiful peach color a few times. When it’s just the two of them. When Richie  _knows_  that Eddie’s peach is for him.

But Eddie still hasn’t said it.

Then again, neither has Richie. But he hasn’t said it because -well because he can’t. Because what if he fucks it up. What if he says it and then he does something that hurts Eddie. That’s really what he’s scared of. Of hurting that boy somehow. Because Eddie is the best thing that’s happened to him. Him and the other losers. Basically the best thing that will ever happen to Richie.

And the tall boy fears that one day he’s going to fuck everything up without even knowing it.

“I brought you half of my sandwich.” He hears a voice say to his left. Richie’s necklace begins to get a tad bit hotter as he turns to the short boy. Eddie is wearing a hat, a winter hat even though it is not that cold out yet. It is chilly though but Richie feels  _fine_  in his old jean jacket he bought at a yard sale once.

“Ah fuck yes.” Richie smiles and takes the triangle wrapped sandwich. Eddie makes his lunch every day, not trusting the schools food, and he cuts his sandwiches in half. The first time he did it Richie felt his heart grow bigger for the boy and every day since it continues to grow.

“It’s fucking cold.” Eddie slips into some gloves and begins to eat his sandwich, looking out to the parking lot of the school.

“It’s so not cold, quit being dramatic.” Richie teases, “Remember what Bev said once; a hoe never gets cold. Therefore you can’t be cold.”

“If you think I’m a hoe then you’re a hoe times a million.” Eddie tells him, mouth full of his sandwich.

“I am. But your mom is the biggest hoe. Wow her fucking-.” And Eddie elbows him. Richie finishes his cigarette and tosses it to the ground. Richie raises his half of the sandwich to his mouth and digs in. Delicious.

“Ran into Bev on my way out here, she said she told you about Jared,” Eddie brings up the subject, “he said he could fuck me and treat me better than you ever could.” There’s a pause. A pause where Eddie looks up at Richie with a soft face and wide eyes. A long pause where Richie thinks how many people could treat Eddie better. A pause that-.

“I said I’d kick him in the balls. Such an annoying motherfucker. He made me do basically the entire German project like who the fuck does that? Pieces of shit do that, that’s who.” Eddie says, leaning his body into Richie’s side.

“Wait, you did our entire Physics homework for the past two weeks?” Richie laughs out.

“Well, I like you.” Eddie smiles, leaning up and leaving a peanut butter kiss onto Richie’s cheek.

“Hmm, that sucks because the only Kaspbrak I like is Sonia.” Richie teases, his mouth full as he shoves the rest of the sandwich in. Glad that even though Eddie hates his mom and his mom hates Richie he can still make jokes about it. Eddie always laughs.

“Oh fuck you.” Eddie pushes him but not far because he’s back at Richie’s side in seconds. Half of Richie is warm with Eddie’s heat. His chest warm from the heat of his necklace. And his heart warm with the love he feels for the smaller boy.

“You wanna fuck? Out here in the parking lot? Ed’s you dirty boy.” Richie winks down at him, he can see Eddie’s cracked necklace glowing peach. Richie’s peach. Richie’s love.  _Fuck_.

 "Don’t call me that?” Eddie tells him, slipping his arm around Richie’s waist, the taller boy throws his own arm around his shoulder. He debates taking a bite out of Eddie’s half of his sandwich, because fuck he’s the slowest eater.

“A dirty boy? Okay Ed’s, I won’t call you that anymore.” Richie teases even more.

“I’m serious Richie.”

“I’m serious too my cute Ed’s.” Eddie rolls his eyes as he takes a bite of his sandwich. Richie watches him, chewing slowly, and he catches sight of his own necklace that’s stuck on one of the buttons on his jacket. He reaches up his free arm to move it and spots the peach of Eddie’s love. He says nothing but he does smile just a bit more.

*

Richie is faced with Eddie’s anxiety on the Tuesday before Christmas break. Eddie has a speech to give in his English class that he shares with Bill and Mike. He’s been off all day, Richie has noticed him shaking, being snappier and fidgeting more than normal. Richie should have said something but of course he decided against it.

It happens of course whenever Richie leaves Music class to use the bathroom.

It’s all about the timing.

“R-R-Richie!” He hears the stutter and turns around, swinging the bathroom pass in his hand as Bill is jogging up to him; a panicked look on his face.

“What’s up big Bill?” He asks and it’s when Bill is stood right in front of him, slightly out of breath and stuttering out the situation that Richie actually starts to worry. 

“It’s E-E-Eddie,” and fuck that’s all it takes for Richie’s long legs to lead him towards the English room, with Bill at his side. He glances down at his necklace to see that’s it is an ocean of green and black with some red for anger in there. Richie walks a bit faster.

“He’s in the b-b-bathrooms near Ms. Trainer’s r-r-oom, he’s having some k-kind of anxiety a-a-attack. Mike and I t-t-tried to help b-but he pushed us a-away a-and kept r-repeating your name.” 

Richie switches directions and makes a sharp turn. His mind goes back to a little bit ago where Eddie was crying from the  _aftermath_  of an attack. How should Richie handle this? Can he handle this? Can he be a good soulmate; march through that bathroom door and fix everything. His mind tells him no. But he keeps moving forward. 

“What do I fucking do?” Richie whispers out to Bill when he spots the bathroom door. He doesn’t need to look at Bill to see the look of sympathy on his kind face. Maybe Bill should go in -Bill is good at this kind of stuff. 

 _But he called for you_ , his mind thinks.

“Get him to b-breathe normally and then hold him, he’ll be  _okay_. He h-has you.” Bill says and fuck him why does he need to be the best fucking person in the goddamn world. Richie never asked for this shit. 

Richie takes a deep breath before opening the bathroom door, Bill slightly steps in behind him before it shuts. Mike is in the corner near the sinks, crouched down and saying things to Eddie. Sweet things. Beautiful things. Things that Richie would never think to say because he’s too busy thinking about fucking mom jokes instead of understanding emotions.

He takes another deep breath and makes his way over to Mike and the sobbing boy in the corner. He crouches down next to Mike; laying a hand on his shoulder to nicely tell him to fuck off. He stands up and away. Richie looks at his soulmate. Eddie’s face is in his hands and his tears are dripping down his arms. His necklace is in his hands as well, the chain looped between his fingers. He’s sobbing weirdly; loud yet no air gasps in between.

Like Bill said get him to a normal breathing.

So, with nervous sweaty hands, Richie places them against each of Eddie’s arms. Eddie does nothing but Richie knows  _he knows_  he’s here. No doubt that his necklace is circling through the temperatures. Eddie’s no air sobs get louder and scarier to hear. Richie moves a bit faster now; ignoring how he has no idea what the  _fuck_  he’s supposed to be doing.

“Babe, Ed’s.” He says in his lowest softest voice, rubbing his hands up and down his soulmates arms. Eddie still doesn’t move. Richie looks back to where Mike and Bill are watching with worry in their eyes. Mike though gives him a small smile and a head nod for encouragement. He turns back to the boy.

“Ri-.” Eddie chokes into his hands. 

“Eddie, Ed’s- I need you to look at me. Look at me baby. It’s Richie. It’s your Richie.” He calls out with a slight desperation in his voice. He tugs gently on Eddie’s wrists until he can  _finally_  see those wide brown eyes. Richie feels a wave of hurt circle through him as he spots the pain and terror; ruining the most beautiful pair of eyes he’s ever seen.

“Rich.” Eddie sobs. It’s not a question or even a statement but it makes his horrific sobbing a little bit worse sounding. And that scares Richie.

“Yeah it’s me,” Richie licks his lips, moving forward to where Eddie sitting deep in the dirty bathroom corner; Eddie will be complaining about this dirty place later. Now, he’s still breathing oddly, as if he doesn’t remember how to breathe and his lungs are collapsing. Richie worries.

“I need you to breathe baby, you need to breath. Like me.” He says, taking a loud breath in and a loud breath out. Eddie looks at him, joining in on the third breath but he sounds like a helpless baby. He sounds like he’ll never be able to breathe again. His eyes widen just a bit as he struggles to breathe.

It’s terrifying.

At first Richie thinks he’s fucking up and making everything worst but then he remembers the taste of fruit loops and takes his hands off of Eddie’s arms. Eddie’s eyes widen more, he tries and fails to reach an arm out to grip Richie; to hold him, to keep him so that Eddie can be saved.

“Don’t worry,” Richie explains, trying not to scare his boy anymore, “I’m just gonna grab your inhaler for you.” And he reaches forward towards Eddie fanny pack, grabs the object and pushes it into Eddie’s mouth. He counts down to each push of the button; three times until Eddie shakes him off.

Richie keeps the inhaler in his hand. A tight grip on it because he fears he’ll need to use it again. Eddie gasps for a few seconds, his body shaking slightly as his breathing forms into something normal. He blinks out tears at Richie and moves positions.   

“M’sorry.” He hears, Eddie’s arms now wrapped around his knees that are pulled up to his chest. His necklace still in his hands where he’s staring; still crying sloppily. Thankfully his horrific gasps have stopped and Richie feels a bit better that he fixed that.

“Don’t ever apologize.” Richie kisses Eddie’s forehead gently; his lips barely even touching the boy.

“It’s- speech- eyes-.” Is all Eddie can manage to say; tears and little sobs still erupting from his body. He’s staring at Richie with those wide eyes that tell Richie that Eddie is more scared right now than Richie is. That of course makes Richie feel a bit worse.

“Do you need a pill?” Richie asks, unsure of what to do now that Eddie is breathing okay. He isn’t good with words that involve emotions. This isn’t his thing. He’s worried if he should ask Eddie more about what’s happening or if he should leave the boy and give him some space or if he should give him no space and hold him close.

And the question is answered when Eddie blinks at him, lip quivering and holds his necklace in one hand. The other he reaches out, bent at the elbow so it’s barely even a reach, and makes a small grabby hand towards his soulmate. Richie scoots forward, sitting down next to Eddie and rests his body against the smaller boy’s. He reaches up a large hand to fiddle with Eddie’s charm. Its teal with some black spots.

“Hold me.” Is all Eddie says and Richie does. He holds Eddie; letting the smaller boy cry more and use his shirt as a pillow. He isn’t sure how long they sit there in the dirty bathroom but Eddie tells Richie that he can’t do public speaking. Eddie also says that his anxiety attacks usually last for hours but there’s something about Richie that makes them shorter, better and less exhausting.

Mike and Bill leave the bathroom with a smile towards Richie and no words.

It’s later when Richie drops Eddie off after their work shift with a long deep kiss. Richie begins to mount his bike to leave with an odd feeling sitting in his chest. Not knowing if he should stay with Eddie longer or bike away.  

“You don’t hate me?” Eddie asks, his voice soft and small like it has been since the attack. He’s been shrinking himself, hiding as if he’s a mere insect trying to survive in a giant forest. It worries Richie even more when the jokes he made all through work only managed to get a flat smile from Eddie. Richie did hold his hand the entire shift; afraid to let go and trying to somehow absorb Eddie’s sadness.

“Ed’s, you’re too cute for me hate.” Richie teases lightly; his voice just as soft as Eddie’s.

“For my anxiety attacks -you don’t hate me?” He whispers into the night. The streetlight just above Eddie’s lawn illuminates the tears falling onto his cheeks. Richie steps forward, wiping them with his long sleeve for about the millionth time that day. 

“Never in a million years could I hate you.” And kisses Eddie’s forehead, “ask me again in a million and one years because  _fuck_  that’s about to be a  _wild_  answer.” Richie teases again. Eddie smiles shyly at him and takes Richie’s hand, pulling him into the house. He decides to sleep over Eddie’s that night, holding the boy tight all night long. 

Eddie seems more open to discussing his anxiety with Richie after that. The taller boy learns a lot and notices signs easier. He always thinks of the small bottle of pills that sits in Eddie’s fanny pack. Eddie said he doesn’t really need those because he has Richie but yes, those are still fucking important.

He takes one a few days later and tells Richie who hurt him in gym class all those weeks ago. Richie marches into gym and ends up getting dentition after cursing him out, throwing a punch and then needing Eddie to drag him out of the room so Richie didn’t literally murder the boy.

Eddie waits in the library for Richie to finish his after school dentition so he can bike home with him in the cold weather and leave a kiss on the taller boy‘s cheek. He thanks Richie in more ways than one. 

Richie decides that day that he  _can_  handle Eddie’s anxiety and he  _does_  deserve Eddie. All because he loves that fanny pack wearing fucker. And now he  _has_  to tell him how he loves him. 

*

Surprisingly it was Ben’s idea for the losers to get together one chilly Saturday night and drink. The losers got started before Richie and Eddie who showed up a little after 10 once they finished work. But its 11:30 now and Richie falls onto the couch drunk, dizzy and sick of dancing.

Eddie is still going strong. A small cup of something in his hand. It’s his first time being drunk, he admitted to Richie at work that he wanted to drink something. So once they arrived at Bill’s Richie made Eddie...something. He doesn’t remember what but Richie is drinking it as well. It’s good, he thinks. 

Eddie’s eyes are closed and his hips are moving slowly, totally out of beat with the loud music. He’s wasted, Richie can tell, but he’s calm too. Which is a good thing because once Eddie told Richie he wanted to drink Richie kept thinking about Eddie’s anxiety. It worried him, because if Eddie’s had an anxiety attack when Richie’s drunk who even knows what would happen.  _No, no_ drunk Richie would probably try to help and end up breaking Eddie’s arm or something.

One of Richie’s mixtape is playing throughout the room;  _drinking until drunk_ is the title.He sips his drink, keeping his eyes on Eddie as he tries to tell Mike a story. Mike who’s sitting across the room from him but Richie can’t tell, his glasses are...somewhere. Maybe he left them - _oh!_ Eddie took them. Eddie is wearing them in his hair. He tried them on but Richie thought that they made his eyes  _way_  too wide so Richie pushed them up as a headband.

Bev is in the chair near Richie, sitting in Ben’s lap and whispering words into his ear. He has a loopy smile on with a hand on Bev’s leg; both of hers are wrapped in the boy’s hair. Stan is sitting next to Richie actually, talking to Richie who is not paying attention. He rolls his eyes and goes back to his conversation with a very sleepy looking Bill. That boy sleeps after three drinks, every god damn time. 

Mike is actually dancing across the room with his necklace dark blue against his chest. He’s actually in beat with the music unlike Eddie -actually he’s dancing with Eddie, not that the smaller boy would know because his eyes are still fucking closed. His cracked necklace is bright orange against his baby blue shirt. Mike looks down at it.

“Did you drop it?” Mike yells unnecessarily loud, or maybe Richie just thinks it’s loud. 

“Hmm?” Eddie opens his eyes, looking at Mike.

“Your necklace is cracked.” And Mike, the sweet boy he is, in the sweetest voice ever, says the sweetest thing that Richie wishes he would have said instead. “It’s super cute! I bet Richie loves it!”

Mike is smiling at Eddie, obviously blind to the fact that Richie is sitting legit a foot away. And Eddie seems to be blind to that fact too because he says something as if Richie isn’t near him or in the room at all. 

“I think he loves it.” Eddie‘s voice is slightly slurred, his hips moving less slightly as he smiles at Mike. “He hasn’t said it but I think he loves me. I mean I love him. We haven’t said it you know? I mean I think he loves me but we haven’t.” And he’s still smiling as he takes another sip of his drink. His conversation all over the place but to Richie it makes perfect sense.

Eddie loves him but he doesn’t know for sure that Richie loves him. In that moment instead of adding how Eddie doesn’t know about Richie’s love for him to a list; drunk Richie decides to tell him. But there’s also a large flaw in this plan where drunk Richie is basically just like high Richie; he can’t remember shit.

So he stands up, drunker than he thinks and stubbles over to where Eddie is dancing alone again. Mike is out of the room actually,  _fuck_  wasn’t he just here? Weren’t they just talking? Fuck is Richie too drunk and imaging shit now? No, he only imagines shit when he’s high. And of course instead of telling Eddie he loves him he says something else because his brain is not working with him tonight. 

“I think we should get high.” He tells the boy, placing a hand on the swaying hips and adjusts them until they are dancing like they’re at prom. Eddie blinks up at him, stepping on Richie’s socked foot with legit every fucking step. Richie steals back his glasses and looks down at his soulmate; eyes wide and a bit out of focus as he smiles up at the taller boy.

“I have asthma.” Eddie giggles as if it’s the funniest thing. His little fingers begin to pay with Richie’s curls where his arms are wrapped around his neck.

“That’s okay I can do CPR.” He slurs out. 

“Richie, you can’t do CPR!” Bill shouts across the room, Richie flips him off.

“Yeah you failed that test in health class freshman year!” Bev yells as well. 

“Shut the fuck up you losers! I’m trying to flirt with my boy Ed’s so that I can fuck him later in Bill’s bed!” He yells at them all.

“Beep, Beep R-R-Richie.” Bills slurs out. 

“-you know how it affects me, I mean why do you think I convinced you to skip gym when we had to run the mile. It’s because of it. Also because kissing you instead of class is nice. Because you’re nice-.” Eddie is talking to him, apparently he’s talking about his asthma? At least that’s what Richie thinks. But now he’s talking about Richie and how nice Richie is?

“Spaghetti,” Richie interrupts and Eddie keeps his mouth open but stops talking; his lips are wet with alcohol-  _coke and rum!_  That’s the drink Richie made.

Oh wait, what was he going to say to Eddie again?

“Yeah?” The smaller boy says, noticing Richie’s weird silence. That’s how he is when he drinks, he either talks his thoughts out or he can’t talk because he’s so stuck in his thoughts.

“I don’t remember what I had to tell you Ed’s baby but,” he licks his lips and looks into Eddie’s brown eyes. “I think that you and me should make out, like right now, right here.” but then, “and we should get some spaghetti because I think I heard someone say spaghetti.”

Eddie giggles at him. Soft and beautiful. Just like how he is. It’s amazing in every way because Eddie is amazing and Richie loves Eddie.  _Oh fuck!_ That’s what he was gonna tell him! Richie opens his mouth again to say it but Stan is standing up quickly and shouting to the others. 

“To the kitchen for food!” And suddenly Richie wants spaghetti again. He drags Eddie by the hand to the kitchen with the other losers. He forgets what he was gonna tell Eddie but he gets spaghetti and they do make out so maybe its not so bad that Richie didn’t do that thing he said he would do.

Maybe another time. 

*

It’s early January when Richie finds his mother drunk and passed out on the couch. Having just gotten home from a night movie marathon with the losers’ he decides to skip helping her and heads straight upstairs. But of course, in this household Richie’s happiness never seems to stay that way. It’s always seen, pushed away and replaced with hurt.

“You’re just going to leave your mother like that?” Richie hears as he passes his parents’ bedroom, his dad standing against the doorframe a beer in his hand a million more on his breath. Richie turns to the man, standing barely an inch shorter and holds in the small bit of fear he feels. 

He says nothing. Went looks Richie up and down, stopping at his necklace. His dad reaches out a hand and pushes the necklace into Richie’s chest. The boy does nothing but take it. 

“She’s sleeping I see.” Went slurs out, “she’s probably gonna be just like your mom. A fucking  _cunt_  whose gonna give you a dirty son with no respect. No respect. No respect.” He repeats, slurring his words and chugging the rest of the beer. He doesn’t bother throwing it in the overflowing trash can and instead tosses it at Richie’s feet.

It’s funny. How Went thinks Richie will end up like him, with a soulmate like his mom. But Richie’s not like him...right? And Eddie is far from being like Richie’s mom. Eddie is, a saint, an angel sent from heaven or some shit to protect and love Richie. But of course, Richie has a big mouth, a mouth that sometimes he can’t ever keep quiet and right now seems to be one of those time. 

“Eddie is  _nothing_  like mom.” And as soon as the words are out of his mouth there is a strong tension of silence. A strong feeling of fear is wafting off of Richie as he sees his dad stand up more, anger pushing off of him. 

“Eddie. That fucking  _fag_?” Is all he says. Or maybe he says more. Richie tunes him out though. He always does, it’s a beautiful trick that he learned about two years ago. If he thinks hard enough about making new mixtapes and which songs to put on it and what the lyrics mean he can tune out his dads yelling.

What he can’t tune out is the hitting. The beatings that are coming down on him. The abuse that all the losers know about but only Bev understands with her own dad. All the losers have been there at least once when Richie was soulless and expressionless with blood or a bruise showing somewhere on his body. It sucks, that he drags his friends into his dumb problems but being alone with his thoughts and his pains is the worst decision Richie can make.

It’s about half an hour later when he finds himself standing outside of Eddie’s house. He’s staring at his boy’s window. Richie knows he’s sleeping, his necklace tells him that much, but he also knows that Eddie with fix him up and that he will hold him until he falls asleep. All Richie has to do is climb that pillar.

He can’t though.

Not with the aching pain on his side and stomach where his dad decided was the target practice for tonight. One hit to his ribs, another to his stomach, there was one to his chest and maybe one to his back or was that just when Richie lost all strength and fell to the ground? His dad gave up then, just stepped over him and left his son in the hallways upstairs. 

It wasn’t the worst beating he’s gotten, not by a long shot. No, this was a normal one. But fuck if it still doesn’t rip him up a bit more each time. 

As Richie stands there he wishes, not for the first time, that soulmates had mind communication. He wishes that he could fucking tell Eddie to get the hell up and take care of him. And at that thought Richie feels slightly guilty. Guilt and anger, all at himself because he’s a fuck up. Because his dad hates him and he failed to save Eddie in gym that day and he can’t fucking tell his soulmate he loves him.

So, being dumb and named Richie Tozier with a small bit of anger issues, he punches the side of Eddie’s house. It’s brick too, of fucking course it has brick house.  _He hurts._  It hurts, but it drives the pain away from his side just long enough for him to climb the pillar and cross to Eddie’s window. His hand is shaking and bleeding as he taps a bloody knuckle against the glass.

Just once though because it hurts, his side hurts and worst of all his fucking heart hurts. Tears fill his eyes as he lets his head loudly smack against the window. He rests his forehead there, his curls fall around him as he blinks falling tears onto his bloody hand. It’s shaking, fuck he’s shaking and he’s cold. 

So fucking cold even with the warmth from his necklace.

Thankfully, the light switches on inside of Eddie’s room. Richie flings his head up, wiping away his tears with his clean hand just in time for Eddie to pull back the curtains and push up the window. His eyes are filled with sleep and half of his hair is messed up. He’s wearing Richie’s shirt that falls down so far that if Richie looked a certain way he wouldn’t think the small boy was wearing any boxers.

“Ed’s baby, sorry wrong window I was looking for your mom’s.” He jokes because that’s what Richie does. He jokes and holds up a humorous facade until he brakes -until he  _cracks_.

“Not funny, get inside it’s fucking freezing out there and where is your jacket?” Eddie lectures, letting Richie ache and crawl into the room. He didn’t even notice he left his house without his jacket, he doesn’t even bother to think about how he’s afraid to get it back. Or when he’ll be brave enough to get it back. 

“Like I said Ed’s, I’m a hoe and hoes never get col-.” He gets cut off by small gasp and looks to Eddie. The smaller boy is staring down at Richie’s hand, oh yeah the blood. Good thing he can’t see the dark marks forming under Richie’s shirt; that’s where his soulmate necklace is too. Under his shirt and sending off waves of warmth through him like Eddie always does.

“Come with me.” Eddie whispers and he gently takes Richie’s bleeding and shaking hand towards the bathroom. He’s sitting on the edge of the tub, Eddie on the toilet seat just like that time Richie learned about Eddie’s necklace. How he doesn’t feel temperatures. It’s later when he discovered that touching Richie brings him the temperatures, they aren’t accurate but they’re there.

That’s probably what he’s feels as he begins to clean Richie off. The smaller boy’s hand are shaking just as badly as Richie’s but he still manages to work gently. He’s surprised that he didn’t break his hand. Richie debates what to do as he flinches at the alcohol burn. He could tell a joke. He could tell Eddie he loves him. Or he could cry.

Well, let’s start from the top I guess. 

“Sorry about waking you up, my wang was calling for you.” He fake laughs and it hurts his ribs to try. Eddie’s face is blank so Richie looks down at the cracked necklace. It’s black for Richie’s sadness and Richie isn’t dumb, he knows that Eddie can see it. The small boy can see the pain and tears hiding inside of Richie. He looks away at the white sink behind Eddie.

So, let’s go from the bottom this time.

“It was my dad.” Richie whispers, so quietly that he thinks for a second he said it just in his head. But Eddie raises the bleeding bruised hand and presses a kiss to each knuckle. It’s so sweet. So loving. Something he hasn’t ever truly felt from his parents. Then suddenly Richie is sobbing; there is snot coming and tears falling from his face. He’s trying to talk and tell Eddie what happened but it’s all choked out sobs. 

Eddie shakes harder as he listens. Once Richie’s still bleeding hand is patched up they fall into Eddie’s bed. They face each other, Richie wiping his face on some tissues that Eddie hands him. He looks at the smaller boy who is crying too, silent tears falling down his face. When he sees Richie looking at them he looks away.

“Thank you.” Richie raises his bruised hand to wipe away the others’ tears.

“Sorry, I shouldn’t be crying,” Eddie whispers into the dark room, the moonlight is shinning right on the teens faces. “I just hate seeing you hurt.” He breathes out and he leans forward to peck Richie on his lips. 

“Ed’s I,” Richie licks his lips, adjusts his position and squeezes his eyes at the pain in his ribs. Fuck that’s going to hurt tomorrow. Eddie notices too.

“Yeah?” Eddie questions. He reaches out under Richie’s shirt to place a hand on his ribs. He doesn’t move it and while it doesn’t help, it doesn’t hurt either so Richie let’s him keep it there. It’s warm though, just like his necklace and just like how he hopes Eddie’s necklace feels right now.

Richie reaches out to grab the black charm, it’s cold at first but then it’s warm but then it’s cold again. He runs his finger over the crack and looks into it. It’s like a mirror, Richie thinks, showing his own cracked reflection. Maybe it was meant to be like this all along. Maybe it was always meant to be cracked. Because that necklace represents Richie. It represents his life cracked like the charm or his life fucked up like the temperatures.

He of course doesn’t know that’s how Eddie feels but about himself. That Eddie thinks he is the cracked one in this relationship. The one who can’t say he loves Richie. The one who is afraid of his anxiety. The one who thinks Richie deserves better. Eddie is just as fucked up and worried as Richie is. If only these two boys were smart enough to talk it now.

They are both just messed up boys that are too in love with each other to say it.

Richie spends the rest of week sleeping in Eddie’s house until his dad leaves to Chicago for work. It’s one of the best weeks of his life. Spending sunrise to sunset with his boy. Watching as both their necklaces turn to peach sporadically throughout the days. Richie’s necklace burns the beautiful hot and he makes sure to touch Eddie as much as possible so the others can hopefully be just as warm.

*

“This is the dumbest class.” Stan groans out as Richie sits down in his seat. He’s late for class; again. This time it wasn’t his fault okay, he got stuck behind some slow ass walking freshman. Like god damn we get it your short but walk a bit faster. I mean look at Eddie he’s about two feet tall and he walks faster than Richie’s long legs ever could.

“You mean this class is the hardest class? How does she expect us to finish all of this in fifty minutes?” Bev says sadly, fiddling with the packet that their teacher has assigned to them today.

“I know a way I can fix this.” Richie offers, the joke on the tip of his tongue. He’s sat next to Eddie, of course, while Stan and Bev sit in the desks in front of them.

“Please don’t, you’ll only make it worse.” Stan tries and Richie opens his mouth to say his joke about fucking the teacher but Stan beats him to it.

“Yeah, like in 7th grade when you made our Spanish teacher that mixtape to get us out of a Spanish test.” Stan laughs.

“Oh, I remember that!” Bev exclaims, “you put a shit ton of love songs on it and she made you see the guidance counselor for a week about your love for her.” She’s laughing now too and Stan has a small smile on his lips.

“I didn’t even love her, I just didn’t wanna take a fucking test. The guidance counselor kept telling me that I’m young and I should only love my soulmate. I also got a D on that test.” Richie pouts. He feels Eddie’s small hand touch his own and he looks to see a smile from the boy.

“Less laughing and more working or I’ll have to split you up.” Mrs. McGukin butts in, walking around them slowly.

“You can’t split us up MG, I’d die without them.” Richie jokes with her, making the stupidest nickname ever just to get under her skin. Of course she looks nowhere as cute Eddie does when Richie uses nicknames. His face scrunches up and his eyes roll; it’s adorable. 

“I think you mean your grade might die, Mr. Tozier.” She fires back. Richie hears Bev and Stan make an obnoxious ‘ _ooooo_ ’ sound at her burn. He feels Eddie squeeze his hand, it’s probably a warning but Richie thinks it’s an encouragement. 

“My grade will never die, as long as I have this cutie tootie here to copy off of.” And he leans closer to Eddie. She tuts her mouth and walks away from them; annoyed with Richie.

“Rich, don’t tell her I’m doing your work! That’s how we get kicked out of school for plagiarism!” Eddie hisses at him, gripping his still bruised hand a  _bit_  too tight. Richie sinks into the pain.

“Calm down your little bootie.” Richie responds, winking at the boy. Eddie blushes adorably.

“Fuck you’re cute,” He tells him, “cute, cute cute!” And he leaves three kisses on Eddie. One on each cheek and one on his lips. He hears Stan fake gag to Bev who laughs at him.

“You two are so gross. Sometimes it’s cute but right now it’s just gross.” Bev tells them.

“You’re just jealous that Ben doesn’t show this much PDA with you.” Richie fires back, resting his chin on hand. 

“Ben doesn’t show PDA with me because I like privacy with my relationship.” Bev tells him with a smile.

“Eddie and I could care less about our privacy-.”

 “No, I actually really care about-.” Eddie tries but Richie keeps talking.

“-you could come over and watch us fuck, record it, and then sell the tape and we will be just fine.” 

“Did you just ask Bev to film a porno with you two?” Stan asks, bored as always.

“No he didn’t-.” Eddie tries again and Richie appreciates it but he cuts him off anyways.

“Yes I did.” He throws an arm across the aisle to pull Eddie chair next to him. “We can start the filming right now,” And he leans down towards Eddie, sticking his tongue out and obnoxiously licking the air. He watches as Eddie blushes and giggles.

“Rich, Stop.” Eddie giggles, leaning back and away from Richie’s tongue. He continues to press forward, his necklace hot and swinging between them. He places his large hands against Eddie’s side and goes to tickle him.

“Yes Richie, please stop.” Bev groans but Richie ignores her.

“Rich!” Eddie nearly shouts when Richie’s fingers dig into the others side. The class is watching them now. As Eddie is thrashing and fighting again Richie who is still tonguing the air as he tickles his small soulmate.

“Mr. Tozier! Mr. Kaspbrak!” Mrs. McGukin yells. Richie sighs, not wanting Eddie to get in trouble as he pulls back and away. Eddie face is bright red and his necklace is glowing peach. Glowing for the love Richie feels when he looks into those wide eyes filled with tears of laughter. He watches as Eddie runs a hand through his perfectly styled dark hair, a sense of anxiety filters off of him as their teacher is approaching them.

“Sorry M-.” Richie attempts but she’s having none of it. She splits the group up and makes them do their work individually in each corner of the room. Eddie and Stan actually finish the packet while Bev gets a third of it done and Richie only has his name written at the top. He spent the rest of class chewing on his pencil and watching the boy he loves; thinking about how to  _finally_  say it out loud.

* 

Richie loves making mixtapes. Ever since he first learned how he’s made them he’s loved them. Well, not lately. Ever since high school he’s slowed down on making the tapes. Maybe it’s because he’s made so many for the other losers that he’s running out of song to put on. But who doesn’t have one is someone that Richie  _needs_  to make one for. He decided when Stan mentioned how Richie made that mixtape for their 7th grade Spanish teacher.

He’s going to say he loves Eddie through a mixtape.

It’s not a flawless idea but Richie thinks music is the most important thing in his life. He has posters of bands that litter across his bedroom along with papers he’s tapped there that have lists of songs that go together for different mixtapes. There’s a black container under his bed where he keeps all the tapes. Some days when he’s sad or bored he’ll reorganize them; sometimes alphabetical or by favorite to least favorite.

His favorite one is the one he made himself just last year. It’s titled  _for the good times_  and he’s not sure why but he loves it. Now speaking of love he needs to somehow transform his love for Eddie into one of these goddamn tiny tapes. He has a list of a few songs but before he can put any of them on he needs to record himself; he needs to say those three words out loud.

He’s sat on his blow up neon blue chair that Stan bought him last year for his birthday. He has the recorder in his hands as he taps his fingers against the microphone, terrified to speak those three words out. His parents aren’t home and Richie knows that he only has about twenty minutes before he’s late to work and therefore ten minutes before he’s late to picking Eddie up.

“I can do this,” Richie whispers to himself. He thinks of Eddie’s cute face and all the times his own necklace has been peach. Eddie loves him so why is it so difficult for him to say it. It’s been what, over seven months, since he met the boy. Seven months since he’s felt the first warmth coming from his necklace.

He remembers when it first happened. It was a week before he met Eddie. There was a significant change in temperature, it was warmer, so much warmer around his neck. Richie didn’t tell anyone, was too excited and nervous. Then when he met Eddie his necklace burned so hot that he fell off his bike. Then he caught sight of the boy and he couldn’t hold back calling him  _cute_  and  _adorable_  and fuck he was a sass mouth right from the start. He was perfect. Absolutely perfect.

But he hid his necklace. And when Richie felt the cold necklace after work that day he felt so broken. So  _cracked_. He didn’t stop his crush though, he kept the slowly forming love he had for the boy and didn’t even try to hide it. He was sure that Eddie was his soulmate and fuck he was right. So right, because Eddie loves him and Richie loves Eddie and-.

A knock at his front door cuts off his thoughts. Richie stands up, setting down the recorder and skips down the stairs. He opens the door and the one and only short fucker is standing there. Geared up in winter wear like he has all week. “ _The weather man said that it’s going to snow Richie! And your dumb jean jacket won’t save you from getting hypothermia!_ ” Adorable, god he’s adorable.

“Ed’s!” Richie shouts, sweating a bit with the nerves of what he just almost did. Of what he almost said.

“Don’t call me that. It’s fucking freezing out here.” Eddie pushes into the house, he’s bundled up with all the works; a hat, gloves, scarf, and a huge winter jacket that’s probably bigger than Eddie himself.

“Well come in, come in to casa de Richie and let the big man warm you up.” Richie throws his arms back, welcoming Eddie to the hell he calls home. His parents shouldn’t be here anytime soon so he doesn’t worry about them coming in on the two boy. He hopes that Eddie won't judge him for the dirt and empty beer bottles laying around. Its gross, Richie knows it so that means Eddie's skin must be crawling at the sight before him. He doesn't look bothered though, he just smiles at Richie with that fucking cute ass smile.

“I can’t believe I’ve never been to your house before. I just thought I would pick up your bony ass for work for a change.” Eddie teases, stripping out of his outfit and down to his work vest and tight pants. Richie stares for just a second too long.

“Let’s go to my room,” Richie begins to lead the way, “now you’ll be the 632 person who I will fuck in my childhood bedroom.” Eddie pushes him in the room with irritation. “Wow be careful with the merchandise. I have a date with your mom after work, gotta be in tip top condition for her.”

“Sometimes I wish I could punch you in the throat.” Eddie teases, looking around Richie’s room. Richie sits back down the blow up chair as he watches Eddie circle his room. It’s a mess with dirty plates and clothes scattered around the room but it’s Richie so he just leans back in the chair.

“Do it, it turns me on.” Richie jokes, watching Eddie’s cracked necklace shine in the sunlight from the window. It’s beautiful.

“Does it now?” Eddie teases, a wild look in his eye as he sits down on Richie’s lap. The blow up chair squeezes out with the added weight.

“Hmm, my wang is always turned on for your short ass.” Richie tells him, wrapping his arms around him and kissing the smaller boy’s neck lightly. Eddie just tuts at him. Richie looks at down, at both of their necklaces, at both of the peach glowing and decides that he doesn’t need a mixtape to tell Eddie he loves him.

“We should go. I hate being late for work.” Eddie tells him and Richie holds onto him because it’s now or never. He can do this. 

“Hey,” He says, a bright smile on his face he grabs Eddie’s cracked necklace. It’s cold. Eddie thinks that Richie is looking for an excuse to be late so he moves his mouth fast.

“I mean you’re late all the time and I get that you’re used to that but I am Eddie fucking Kaspbrak and I’m not late to any shit-.”

Richie ignores him and decides to finally say it.

“I love you.” Richie’s grinning brightly as the words leave his mouth. Eddie’s face is just as bright as his. It’s full of wide eyes and he grabs Richie’s necklace, feeling the hot burn coming from it.

“Did you just say you love me in a british accent?” Eddie asks him, a smile on his face but anxiety in his heart.

“Yeah, I did, mate. I really love you.” Richie uses the accent again. It's not because he's worried, it's just because he can. Richie leans down and kisses him shortly; not truly knowing how to  _explain_  his love. It’s just -it’s just -a masterpiece that he can stare at and be around all day and Eddie just so happens Richie’s masterpiece. 

“I love you too, you dumbass.” Eddie teases, kissing Richie with a smile and the chair squeaks below them.

Because where else would the perfect time and place be then when they’re late for work, sat in each other’s laps on a stupid neon blow up chair that Richie is going to break within the next month. He breaks it when he decides to see how far away he can jump onto it from his bed. 

It snows that night and Richie and Eddie walk their bikes home after work. The peach love of their necklaces is bright in the moonlight. Eddie invites Richie to sleepover and who is Richie to deny his boy. 

 _Fuck_ , they’re in love.

Screw the mixtape idea. It’s corny and overused. But of course Richie makes Eddie that mixtape anyways. The opening song is  _Physical by Olivia Newton-John_. Eddie smacks his chest and laughs at it. The closing song is  _Heaven by Bryan Adams_. Three months after that he also makes Eddie another mixtape that is solely  _Africa by Toto_ on it six times because according to Eddie one drunken night ‘ _it’s our fucking song, Rich!_ ’ And Richie not only agreed but decided to tease Eddie with the tape.

It’s Eddie’s favorite tape to this day.

*

“So I’m getting a car,” Stan announces at the lunch table to the rest of the losers. Richie looks at him with a smile as Eddie sighs out.

“Stan! You can drive me to me the strip club now.” Richie tells him, earning an elbow to his ribs from his shortest friend. 

“You’re not even old enough.” Stan deadpans. 

“Yeah, Stan h-h-has offered to drive us all to H-Hugo’s.” Bill stutters out, one of his fingers wrapped around a tight curl in Stan’s hair. The entire table, excluding Eddie, gasps out in excitement.

“No fucking way!” Richie shouts, hopping out of his seat and pushing his chair back until it hits the table behind them. He debates jumping on the table, ripping his shirt off and screaming about Hugo’s but he decides against it.

“Are you serious? Fucking don’t joke about this.” Bev leans across Ben to poke Stan in the chest as a threat.

“I’m serious.” Stan tells them all, a small smile on his face. Richie watches as Mike and Ben instantly start talking about how excited they are. “I figured since we didn't do anything over Christmas break a few weeks ago that we could skip school and celebrate it at Hugo’s?”

“Fuck yes we can!” Richie yells, earning a shush from the table behind them. He sees Eddie flip them the bird out of the corner of his eye.

“I think I might cry. I honestly think I might cry.” Bev rambles with a bright smile on her face.

“Stan this is so cool! Honestly, this is going to be amazing.” Mike says. Richie turns to Eddie to share his excitement with him. His boy has a small smile with a look of confusion yet embarrassment on his face. Then it hits Richie, Eddie has no fucking clue what they’re talking about.

“Ed’s, you’re gonna love Hugo’s!” Richie’s still yelling. He pulls his chair back and plops down closer to his soulmate than before.

“What is it?” Eddie asks with his beautiful wide eyes and his innocent face and _fuck_ every since they admitted they love each other Richie thinks his heart has grown so much fuller for the boy.

Ha. Grown fuller. That’s funny.

“It’s magical.” Ben answers.

“Yeah,” Bill’s says. “I-it’s an aquarium b-b-but it’s so be-autiful.”

“Oh Ed’s, it’s almost as pretty as you.” Richie comments, Eddie blushes.

“We used to go to Hugo’s back in middle school as a field trip but one year some kid fell into the dolphin exhibit. So, the school stopped taking us there.” Bev explains.

“Yeah,  _someone_  had to fucking ruin it all.” Stan smiles at Richie. He raises his hands up in defense.

“Stan, you pushed me in it!” He’s yelling again.

“Wait- you fell into a dolphin cage!” Eddie breaks through. He looks at his soulmate with judgement and amusement on his face.

“Stan and I were class buddies and I wanted to see if I could touch the dolphin. So, when I was leaning down to touch it Stan fucking pushed me in!” Richie tells. It’s true. He was 11 years old and him and Stan were buddies who couldn’t leave each other’s side. So when they passed the dolphin enclosure Richie held Stan back so that he could touch the dolphin. Stan heard someone coming and nudged Richie in on accident. Richie blames that it Stan pushed him.

“Dolphins are wild animals! What if they hurt you or tried to eat you or-.” Eddie is cut off by a loud laugh from Richie. He feels the short boy’s glare on him as he throws back his head.

“You’re a dumbass.” Bev says to Eddie with a smile. He goes to argue back but Richie kisses his nose, still chuckling to himself. Eddie is cute. He’s damn cute. And sometimes he’s smart. Smarter than Richie at least. But sometimes he’s a dumbass. Dumber than Richie if possible. And fuck if Richie didn’t love him more than humanly possible.

He looks at Eddie’s necklace and slips his arm around Eddie back. He pushes a hand into the neck of Eddie’s shirt and feels for the chain where’s it’s laying. He holds it to feel the temperatures change. Every time it feels as warm as the one on his own chest he smiles. And Eddie does too.

The others are discussing the plan. This Saturday, since Richie and Eddie don’t work and neither does Mike, they plan to go to Hugo’s.

“I call shotgun!” Richie yells as they leave the lunchroom. His arm is around Eddie shoulder and he’s still gripping the necklace.

“You can’t call shotgun until the day of.” Stan tells him.

And on Saturday morning Richie doesn’t call shotgun but only because he wants to sit with Eddie in the backseat. 

*

“-and this is where Stan pushed me into the water.” Richie chuckles and points down to where the dolphins are swimming. A higher fence has since been built. He’s holding Eddie’s hand, dragging him to aquarium to aquarium and pointing to each fish. He’s made about 14 jokes about how they look like Eddie’s mom. No one laughed but Eddie does shake his head and smile.

“I didn’t push him.” Stan walks by then with Bill by his side.

“He did.” Richie whispers into Eddie ear and just because he can he licks his lips and places a wet kiss on his soulmates cheek.

“Ew,” Eddie cringes, pulling Richie along with the others and wiping off his face. “You know I like kisses but why are yours so god damn wet all the time.”

“It’s all your mom's pussy juice-“ Richie tries.

“Ah! No! Stop!” Eddie yells. The group gets a few looks from fellow people. It’s not a busy day at Hugo’s. Probably because it's supposed to blizzard in the January weather. Richie doesn’t mind though. It just makes for a better birthday for him; spending it inside this large water filled building with his friends and his soulmate.

As they move along, the group slowly splits up. Ben and Bev get caught up with the starfish and the seahorses. Bill, Stan and Mike stay in the room with the sharks. While Richie drags Eddie to his favorite room in the whole building and thank fuck it hasn’t changed over the years. It’s a circle room that has a circle aquarium as the walls of it. The only glow is coming from the lights inside the water. The movement of the fish and moving water reflect throughout the room’s floor and ceiling.

“Wow.” Eddie breaths out as Richie pulls him into the room. They’re the only people in it and fuck if this isn’t the best moment in the world. He watches as Eddie’s face is illuminated by the water's reflection. His soft face is amazed by the different varies of fish that swim around them. Richie stands in front of him, facing him, and looking at his free hand resting on his fanny pack.

“This is my favorite room.” Richie tells him. A mom joke pops into his head but for some reason he ignores it.

“I can tell why.” Eddie let’s go of Richie’s hand and walks around the room. “This fish is cute.”

“Not as cute as you.” Richie says and winks even though Eddie isn’t looking.

“You’re the worst.” He hears Eddie say as the boy watches a fish zoom past his eye. Richie is still stood in the middle of the room just watching his boy. He isn’t sure why but he just watches Eddie move about until the boy catches him staring.

“What?” Eddie asks and walks over to Richie.

“Nothing, honestly nothing.” Richie smiles and it is nothing. It’s just he loves his soulmate and he never wants to look away.

“Okay?” Eddie bites his lip, the light waves wash over his face, “I know I'm super fucking late but I have a birthday present for you.” He whispers quietly.

“You got me a present!” Richie says loudly. He watches as Eddie zips open his fanny pack. The boy gently moves two object around, one being his inhaler, as he pulls out a cassette tape.

“It’s not much,” Eddie hands it over, “I’m a shitty gift giver but I hope you find some of it good.” He’s nervous, Richie can tell. That’s something he thinks he’s good at now. Telling when Eddie is on edge or when he’s anxious. Richie takes the tap in his hand and flips it over to the title of the mixtape.

“ _Soulmate Love by your Ed’s_.” Richie reads out loud. He feels his heart explode in his chest, it rains down little mini hearts throughout his body and into his bloodstream. Instead of what each song title is it lists random days. Starting with when they met and ending with the week after they finally said they loved each other.

“Just an FYI this is not permission to call Ed’s, as I still hate it.” Eddie lies. He knows it’s a lie and Richie knows it’s a lie. And on their wedding day Richie makes Stan introduce them as _Richie and Ed’s Tozier_ just to pisses the smaller boy off. Even though they both know he  _loves_  the nickname.

“Oh fuck Eddie, this is about to be so fucking good. Unless you put some shitty ass Cyndi Lauper on it which I know you fucking did.” Richie laughs.

“Cyndi Lauper isn’t  _that_  bad.” Eddie defends her. Richie laughs again and takes one of Eddie’s hand. He pulls the tiny boy closer and kisses him gently. His lips chapped and dry so that Eddie can’t complain about wet kisses.

“Oh, but Ed’s she is. She is that bad.” Richie teases when they pull back. One of his hands holds the tape, the other holds Eddie’s tiny hand. He looks at Eddie, at his soulmate, and fuck he doesn’t even think soulmate is even a strong enough word to express his love and connection to this short boy.

This fucking boy who put  _two_  Cyndi Lauper songs on the tape. Other than that though Richie can agree that it is the best mixtape ever made; excluding his own masterpieces.

Richie smiles at Eddie who is smiling back just as bright. The shorter boy’s necklace lays over top of the navy jacket he’s wearing. It’s peach. Love. And in that moment as Richie looks and admires the best human in the world he thinks that the necklace will always be peach. That the only emotion that Richie will ever feel is love and  _fuck_  as he looks down at his own necklace he believes that Eddie is thinking the same thing.

Richie doesn’t hesitate as he leans down for a deep kiss from his soulmate.

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts???


End file.
